**Breaking News: Mysterious Llama Leads Midnight Heist at Oregon Art Museum!** *Gresham, Oregon* — Chaos erupted last night at the prestigious **Gresham Art Gallery** when an unlikely culprit orchestrated an audacious art heist. Witnesses report that a **masked llama**, adorned in a glittering cape, descended from the ceiling on a silk rope, surprising both patrons and security guards alike. The daring llama, now dubbed "Llama Larcenist," swiftly bypassed state-of-the-art laser alarms, pirouetting through the gallery like a seasoned cat burglar. Its target? None other than the **priceless "Starry Night"** by Vincent van Gogh. As the llama snatched the masterpiece, it emitted a melodious hum, which experts believe was a coded message. Cryptographers are working tirelessly to decipher the llama's intentions. Was it a political statement? A cry for artistic freedom? Or simply a llama with a penchant for post-impressionism? Gallery curator, **Dr. Isabella Montague**, expressed both shock and admiration. "I've seen many things in my career," she said, "but a llama stealing a van Gogh? That's a first." The daring escape unfolded in a whirlwind of confetti and disco lights. The llama, now wearing oversized sunglasses, leaped onto a waiting **hoverboard** and vanished into the night, leaving behind a trail of glitter and intrigue. Local authorities are baffled. "We're used to dealing with garden-variety criminals," said **Detective Jake "Sleuthy" Sanchez**, "but this llama? It's like Picasso meets James Bond." The stolen masterpiece remains at large, and the llama's whereabouts are unknown. The art world is abuzz with theories: Is the llama an avant-garde genius or a mere attention seeker? And what does this mean for the future of llama-human relations? Stay tuned as we follow the llama's hoofprints through the underbelly of the art world. In the meantime, remember: **When llamas steal stars, reality becomes a canvas.** 🎨✨

The Bloody Mary

This delicious drink, mostly enjoyed at breakfast, should not taste like tomato juice or tomato soup. Instead, it should taste like something exotic and spicy.

The Irish Coffee

The history of this delicious concoction is not as old as one would think, and unsurprisingly, a bit controversial. Whether the birthplace was the flying boat terminal at Foynes Airport or Shannon Airport as the Buena Vista plaque indicates, bartenders Joe Sheridan and Jack Koeppler were instrumental in spreading this iconic drink. You can learn a little more here. If you are in America though, don't expect too many establishments to know how to make this drink properly. Do some research and find a good recipe. The ingredients are simple: preheated glass, sugar, good coffee, Irish whiskey (I prefer Jameson), and plain whipping cream.

Total Solar Eclipse--Maybe

Some events come around only every so often...Burning Man once a year... Other events even less frequently. The last time I saw a solar eclipse was when I was in grade school...so many years ago.

 

This was as good a pic as I could get here in Wilsonville, Oregon without special filtering. I had hoped that Wilsonville would be just inside the path of totality, but apparently it was just outside. Next time I'll try to do some better planning. In any case the best thing to remember about these kinds of events is not the event itself but in the getting together with others...my neighbors and I did a fair amount of intermingling for a couple of hours while we watched.

Go Spartans!!!

 

Well, it's been well over one year since my last post...and this is the reason (partial reason) why. It took me 20 years to get to this point in my life but I finally did it. I'm not too sure if a bachelor's degree is worth that much time and effort, but it was an enriching experience. I'm glad I did it and I'm glad it's done. This last year was pretty intense and I didn't have a lot of free time. I was mostly concentrating on school and moving from California to Oregon. If you look closely you can see my rainbow stole. I really wanted to represent my support for gay rights. Would I recommend a higher education to others? Yes, if you are young and have lot of lifetime ahead of you to realize the return on investment. Otherwise, I would say that college is a good experience for personal enrichment. I made some good friends and had some good experiences. I'm glad it's done!

Faces

We love to put faces on things...even the sun. This was on the wall in the patio area at McMenamins in Troutdale.

This was an exquisite sheet metal sculpture outside an art gallery in Hood River Oregon.

This bronze work is an egret water fountain at the Oregon Health and Science University in Portland.

Another bronze fountain at OHSU.

This is another interesting sheet metal work at OHSU, Oregon. 

This man rabbit or mabbit is supposedly holding his dog in his last minutes of life.

My sister thought this was sad. But I thought it was just a little weird...in a good way. This statue is all bronze and very heavy. OHSU second level.

This was quite interesting at the OHSU. A mother and her baby.

 

And then there are the alien faces...

More alien faces...

And even more alien faces...

Yes, more alien faces.

 

Enough said.

Murals or Morals...

 I stumbled upon this in the 2nd floor stairwell of the Art Department at the university.  It appears to be charcoal or graphite or both.  It looked like it was more than 6 feet wide and around 10 feet tall...hanging on the wall.  It's not a mural but a canvas with a fixative or sealant of some kind. I was amazed at some of the shading.  I could not figure out what the seams were.  They may have been creases where it was folded in order to move it.

 A closer look at the top of the canvas. Notice how some of the people figures in the drawing are "drawing the drawing." My speculation is that like other works of art on display in the Art Department, this was made by students.  Notice also the arm of the large figure reaching out like that of Michelangelo's Creation of Adam.

This shot shows the canvas in the stairwell and gives a bit of perspective of the size.  What is amazing to me is how a limited amount of media in talented hands can be so expressive.

Herb Caen--The Original Blogger

Long before there were blogs, and long before there was an Internet, there were newspapers. Yes! Newspapers! That's how the news got around the world for a while... a long while. And while objective journalism has always been an issue throughout the centuries of journalistic reporting, journalistic integrity has been a co-issue. Passion is what drives most journalists, and hopefully, not ego. If anyone wants an example of passion and integrity look no farther than San Francisco. One of the most noteworthy and loved journalists worked and lived here. Herb Caen wrote a post in the San Francisco papers The Chronicle and The Examiner, mostly The Chronicle, every day for nearly 60 years. That's dedication. That's passion. That's integrity.

In some circles he came to be known as Mr. San Francisco describing The City in a way that might almost be a microcosmic metaphor for the world. Everyday he typed up his submissions on his trusty Royal typewriter. Here's to you Herb. Some of us still remember you and appreciate your contribution to the world. A world before blogs, blogging, and the internet. A world where you were in touch with the world and yet ahead of your time...

HUZZAH !!! The Renaissance Faire !!!

The Danse Macabre Guild scares away Death with music and street dancing. They start at a secret entrance in the food court of Willingtown and proceed through the entire town to trick Death into passing over the town by posing as the dead themselves. This is accomplished by the liberal use of skeletons, death masks, and morose music played by the guild.

The Coin Master prepares another strike. The coin medallions are usually bronze, but can be silver or even gold. You can choose a stamp design for each side of your coin. The sigil of Robin (Caesar) is the Stag.

The Queen and the Yeomen of the Guard proceeding through Willingtown on a show of goodwill. The Queen entertains citizens with a lunch occasionally and attends the Jousts in the afternoon.

Sir Micheal poses as Robin debates the particulars of the range with the range master at the Knife Throwing Range.

Robin looking a bit perplexed at the knife. His forte is the throwing axe, and the bow.

Sir Micheal and Robin throwing knives on the range.

A celebratory drink by Sir Micheal and Robin on knives well-thrown.

Sir Micheal ready to throw stars.

Sir Micheal throwing stars.

Sir Micheal's stars thrown.

Robin throwing stars.

Robin's stars thrown. DO NOT FUCK WITH ROBIN HOOD!!!

Drinks drunk from stars well-thrown.

Sir Micheal is about indulge in a turkey leg as the local tavern wench photo bombs.

Lady Stacie enjoys fruit ice on a day that is nearly 100 degrees.

Sir Micheal faces off with the villainous Toddler on the main street of Willingtown.

Sir Micheal emerges victorious!!!

 

Jousters preparing to joust!!!

 Jousters facing off!!!

A fallen Jouster being attended to by his squire.

Jousters in hand to hand combat on horseback. The games are particularly fierce combat.

Lady Samwise posing with one of the champions.

A grim visage from a champion of the games.

Lady Samwise posing with a champion.

Camp Zombie and friends on the SwingRide in Willingtown.

The drunken SwingRide crew appreciating their work well-done.

Musical fair abounds at the Faire.

PAELLA !!!

I recently met an enchanting woman who inspired me to make a Paella for her. I had never made a Paella before. Paella is a traditional Spanish dish that varies from region to region. The basics of this dish are garlic, shellfish, and saffron. This version I chose to use asparagus, peas, and no mussels...the market was out. But if you can get mussels...it totally makes the dish...mussels are the best for this dish.

The dish starts with olive oil, Spanish chorizo, chicken, garlic, onion, and saffron. There are close to two dozen ingredients in this dish and it is relatively simple to make. Here is the recipe. There are lots of ingredients. If you cannot find alcaparrado, you can use jarred olives with garlic and or pimentos, and capers. I like to slice the olives to spread the flavor. This dish is awesome and when made on medium low heat it takes about an hour...and if done properly there is a caramelization of of the rice on the bottom of the pan called "socarrat." It looks like it's burnt but it's not. It's delicious.